I recently wrote a blog about this topic on my site and received a lot of conflicting messages, some strongly agreed, some strongly disagreed. Though it seems to be a sensitive topic, I believe it is extremely important to talk about, so I will take the heat and write about it. These are my personal thoughts, my personal experience. Take it or leave it.
Alcoholism and drug addiction are the same beast.
You cannot filter out whether you are one or the other, giving yourself permission to indulge in one, if you strongly believe you are the other. You are a person, regardless of what chemical or drink you put into your body, who is at extraordinary risk of dependency. Period. If you believe otherwise, your addiction may be cleverly disarming you, leading you back down the path in which you fought to condemn. A door you believed you had bolted, sealed and cauterized shut. If you sustain one, you will more than likely awaken the other. I believe the only way to suppress this illness is complete and utter abstinence. No alcohol, drugs or prescription medications, specifically ones that contain opioids or benzodiazepines.
But I know the wrath of my addictions, do you know yours?
If you believe you are just a drug addict so you drink, you may be essentially lowering my reserve to say no to drugs. Same applies vice versa. You may be slowly chipping away at the the mortar on a wall you had built to shut the other out, slowly taking it down all by yourself brick by brick. I know because I did. After I gave birth to my son I told myself I was just a drug addict so why not drink, so I drank. Moderation worked, briefly. Within three months I was back to abusing drugs as well as alcohol and I stood dumbfounded to see I was back in the same place I was pre-pregnancy. So now I was a mother, an alcoholic and drug addict. The truth of the matter is, I never wasn’t.
So I played with fire and guess what, I got burned.
We have to live cautiously. We always have to be mindful of our addictions, our reactions and our decisions. We must always check up from the neck up because one momentary lapse of reason can send us down a path self destruction. Remember that we deal with alcohol, cunning, baffling and powerful. Its subtle tongue has mastered the trickery of telling us that we do not need a meeting, or that we are just an alcoholic, or just drug addict, that this time will be different. All different lies and false conditions we have set up for ourselves like a mouse and a cheese trap. It is all a set up.
We have to be smarter than the enemy. Keep it close. Always remain one step ahead because should you take one step back, do not be surprised when your addiction takes two steps forward.