Listening to women AA speakers is such a great experience. The strength she exhibits is amazing. This is a story of overcoming adversity and how Amy finds herself in recovery. There are a few bumps in the road and disappointments, but she trudges on and tells what led her to her new perspective. This tape is an example of how someone can find freedom in the 12 steps and experience healing from alcoholism. Thanks for the awesome share Amy!
Amy’s Experience, Strength, and Hope with Sponsorship
My sponsor has turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me in my program. She’ll have 34 years of sobriety next month. She did a lot more than call the phone line for me, thank God she took me by the hand. She taught me how to behave, how to be a mom, how to be a lady, and how to get me out of the way. She shared her experience, strength, and hope and she still does. She’s an amazing woman and I couldn’t have asked for a better sponsor at the time. I was scared. I was scared if I didn’t do what she told me to do that she wouldn’t call that phone line, and then I’d get in trouble. So there’s a good motivator. It really is, especially for this alcoholic. But I’ve also learned that fear and faith in my world don’t exist in the same space for me. If I’m standing in fear I’m not walking in faith.
[In regards to my legal troubles], luckily I got to do jail time on the weekends. I got to go to jail at six o’clock on Friday and I got out at 6 o’clock on Sunday. My sponsor taught me “you’re going to be the best Big Book you can be in jail.” And I said OK. I was able to share the little experience, strength, and hope that I had with the women in there. I was eager to do laundry I was eager to organize books because I was excited that I didn’t have to stay there all the time. I knew what time I was going to leave. So I got through that. She helped me get through that. She started walking me through the steps immediately.
When Step Two came, I told her I didn’t believe in [anything]. I don’t believe in anything, but you know what my sponsor said? She said you can just believe in nothing happily. And that was enough was enough for me. That was the hope that I needed made a decision. She said it’s just a decision, and you can wake up every day and make that decision. That third step prayer relieve me of the bondage cuffs. I had no idea that that’s what I was doing. I had no idea that I was a prisoner in my own skin.
She helped me with my searching and fearless moral inventory. I was so excited. Finally I get to tell one person all these terrible things that people have done to me, until we got to my part. I didn’t understand that either. She helped me to see that I was the common denominator in all of those things. She shared her experience, and strength, and hope and said I had a lot of things in common with her because what of she did. She shared with me in similar situations, and similar things that she had done when she was active in her disease. So that that gift of identification was there and we had something in common for steps 6 and 7.