When you don’t feel like going to a meeting, go anyway. More than likely you will hear something at that particular meeting that will justify your attendance. At least that always rang true for me. Every Tuesday night rolls around and every Tuesday night I trifle with the idea of going or not going. I think it is safe to say we have all felt that way.
We go to meetings to see what happens when we don’t go to meetings. We hear stories of newcomers and feel their pain as they describe what got them there. We keep that pain alive and in the flesh when we go and I find that to be one of the most important facets of my sobriety, to never forget what got me there. We can also hear about a relapse and learn what led up to it and use that as guidance for our coming days.
At almost every meeting that I had to convince myself to go, I hear something that resonates deep with me. I find that not to be a mere coincidence, but rather my higher power telling me I am exactly where I am supposed to be. The moment I walk into that dreaded meeting, I feel at ease. There is a sense of comfort that warms my sometimes bleak soul and I find there is not much more peaceful than being with my people. People who think like me, people who act like me and people who have, just like myself, feel prey to our deceitful minds. I have yet to leave a meeting having regretted going.
Sometimes we can feel the privilege to stay home. Maybe we have accumulated time or the obsession to drink seemed to have been lifted, that it would be fine if we stayed home and watched that TV show or took a nap because we had a long day. Remain cautious of these thoughts for I have heard many stories of this becoming the catalyst to a relapse. Remember that we have a mind that has mastered trickery and a disease backing it up. An illness that is clothed as a sheep wherein a wolf lies beneath.
We fed our addiction because we ran the show. We acted on our desires and listed to the fraudulent voice inside our head because we felt we had no choice, but we do. Be conscientious, be aware, and remain faithful to yourself and your sobriety.
Do the opposite of what you want to do- get up and go.